So my life currently is a swirling ball of hell.
I work where I dont want to, at times that make no sense.
Because of such I can never sleep when I need to or be awake when needed.
I have constant back pains and am always in pain or am sick.
I only get around to eating one meal a day.
I never go outside.
I have no want to do anything.
Im constantly depressed beyond my conscious reasoning.
The only time I care to be alive anymore is when Im sleeping.
I live in an apartment that causes the most severe stress.
With an incompetent roommate.
And a jobless one.
both of whom totaled their cars in the same week.
I pay for everything.
I make nothing.
I do nothing.
I want something.
But have no idea what it is.
I thought this would help me go somewhere.
Leaving my parents, I thought this would help me move ahead in life.
Its just moving me 1 step closer to my demise and wasting time I could be happy in my life.
I hate it here.
But I cannot leave.
I want to go home.
Or I want to fix this place.
My ex sleeps in my living room and fucks his girlfriend around my house.
It bothers me.
Hes homeless and comes here and takes advantage of this place.
I want him to leave.
But I cant seem to say anything.
My best friend is always depressed so talking to her just keeps me in the same mindset.
I wish she was happy, so she could help me be happy.
My ex lost my snake.
so now Dratini is somewhere in my apt, we searched everywhere.
I am upset to no end.
I am constantly fatigued.
in a constant state of insomnia because people are always here.
I want them all to just leave.
But my idiotic roommate who has no care about anything but concerts wont put an end to it.
He just wants to get all my friends high and drunk.
how exciting.
I want to cry but cant.
I want to be creative but im strained.
I wish to create something but I have no want.
I have not taken a single photograph in months.
I miss the me that had willpower.
But I seem to have lost it.
:(
I wish there was some way out of here.
I just want to be free to be happy again.
I work where I dont want to, at times that make no sense.
Because of such I can never sleep when I need to or be awake when needed.
I have constant back pains and am always in pain or am sick.
I only get around to eating one meal a day.
I never go outside.
I have no want to do anything.
Im constantly depressed beyond my conscious reasoning.
The only time I care to be alive anymore is when Im sleeping.
I live in an apartment that causes the most severe stress.
With an incompetent roommate.
And a jobless one.
both of whom totaled their cars in the same week.
I pay for everything.
I make nothing.
I do nothing.
I want something.
But have no idea what it is.
I thought this would help me go somewhere.
Leaving my parents, I thought this would help me move ahead in life.
Its just moving me 1 step closer to my demise and wasting time I could be happy in my life.
I hate it here.
But I cannot leave.
I want to go home.
Or I want to fix this place.
My ex sleeps in my living room and fucks his girlfriend around my house.
It bothers me.
Hes homeless and comes here and takes advantage of this place.
I want him to leave.
But I cant seem to say anything.
My best friend is always depressed so talking to her just keeps me in the same mindset.
I wish she was happy, so she could help me be happy.
My ex lost my snake.
so now Dratini is somewhere in my apt, we searched everywhere.
I am upset to no end.
I am constantly fatigued.
in a constant state of insomnia because people are always here.
I want them all to just leave.
But my idiotic roommate who has no care about anything but concerts wont put an end to it.
He just wants to get all my friends high and drunk.
how exciting.
I want to cry but cant.
I want to be creative but im strained.
I wish to create something but I have no want.
I have not taken a single photograph in months.
I miss the me that had willpower.
But I seem to have lost it.
:(
I wish there was some way out of here.
I just want to be free to be happy again.
No comments:
Post a Comment